runlikejoy

Stay At Home Californian

Displaced Stay at Home Californian

Displaced Stay at Home Californian

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Entering

I went to the doctor last week and I got a letter today and it goes like this:  "Dear Mrs. McKeon:  Your lab work from your last visit has come back and indicates the following:  You do not have diabetes, Your thyroid function is normal and your FHS level shows that you have entered menopause.

Entered?  My first thought was how long before I can exit?  The good news is that now I know why I have sweat beads that pop out of my knee caps when I'm wearing jeans and when I stand up a look like my knees are weeping.  But the bad news is that I have sweat beads popping out of my knees when I'm wearing jeans and you get the rest.  And it makes me a little crazy.  And it makes me a little anxious.

But . . . at least I know now where the insomnia, headaches, crazy person and freakish behavior comes from.  And yes, I am blaming everything on the menopause.


Friday, July 25, 2014

Ketchup

I went to the doctor last week and I got a new blood pressure medicine to accompany the one I currently take which does nothing for my blood pressure in my opinion.  And since I started taking this new pill I have had nearly a week of insomnia, hot flashes and irritability.  I have to back up.

About 2 months ago I started having night sweats.  For anyone out there who has gone through this, it is the nasty habit of waking up at 2am and feeling like your head is 20 degrees hotter than your body and is drenched in sweat.  It is not fun.  About 6 weeks ago the hot flashes started and they literally are what they sound like.  You are sitting there one moment enjoying your cappuccino or your latte and the next you are trying to figure out why you have sweat beads popping out of your forearms.  I had sweat drops dripping out of my hair a couple of days ago at a PTA meeting.  It is not pleasant but better than a mammogram on the list of uncomfortable things that women have to go through after a certain age.

Anyway - I have had these bouts of insomnia before but this one is particularly kicking my ass.  I'm tired.  I'm tired.  I'm tired.  But when I lay down and the lights go out, I'm wide awake.  I am also exercising a lot lately and it has been swimming so I don't get why all the fatigue until I'm in a laying down position.  Very confusing.

But the good news is that in a week I will be in Sunny California with my ladies and we will begin a 2 week whirlwind of visiting friends and family and Asian restaurants.  I texted my brother and told him that we had to meet up for some coffee and to catch up to which he replied, "Coffee and Ketchup, yummy".


Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Real conversation between two 10 year old girls

Ever wondered what 10 year old girls talk about?

Friend:  I don't like to go to Katie's house because her Mom smokes and it smells bad inside.  And Katie's 16 year old sister smokes too and there is all this beer all over the place and in the kitchen and all they do is smoke cigars and stuff and drink beer even the 16 year old.

My kid:  That is smelly isn't it?

Friend:  Yeah and when you open up the dresser drawers there are all these ashes and all these pretty plates all over the place full of ashes and cigars.  And she asks me all the time to sleep over but I don't know what to say.

My kid:  Why don't you tell her that you don't like it?

Friend:  I don't want to hurt her feelings.

My kid:  You can die from cigarettes.  Michael Jackson died from taking too many cigarettes.  (No matter how many times I've told them that this is not how he died they ALWAYS say this and it drives me crazy)

Friend:  And it is really hot in their house.  She got a divorce and she doesn't have money to turn on the air conditioning and since she stays home all day she just leaves all the doors and windows closed and smokes and drinks beer.  Across the street is Katie's step-mom and she has a big house and air conditioning.  And she goes outside to smoke her cigars.  That way the inside stays nice and clean and smells good.

My kid:  Susan at school started crying because her mom and dad got a divorce and she hadn't seen her dad in a long time and she found out she was going to see him and she started crying because she was so excited.

Friend:  Well Katie's mom and step-mom were best friends but then the dad stopped being married to the mom and moved across the street to be with the step-mom.  He said he was working all the time but he was really smoking cigars across the street with the best friend.

My kid:  That is really sad.

This is when I jumped in the conversation and gave them a lecture on second hand smoke inhalation and the effects of absenteeism parenting.

Why I am loving this place

Tonight I stopped on my way home from the store because a woman had her flashers on and was stopped in the middle of the road.  I leaned my head out as she was getting back in her car and slowed way down and asked "is everything ok?" and she smiled broadly and replied, "Yup, just helping the turtle cross the road".

This is why I am loving Chatham County.

Friday, June 27, 2014

Denial

I have had a difficult time coming up with something interesting or uplifting to write about.  As a writer I would like to pick my own topics and write about what I want to write about but as a writer I have found that if it includes sensitive people, family members, relatives, people that are unable to read something written about themselves or anything less than positive then I might get the cold shoulder or the silent treatment.

Human beings are really strange.  We love to judge and tell others what is not working, what they are doing wrong and what we don't like about them (to others, not to their faces) but we don't want anyone to know we are doing that.  There is this human component that keeps us from blurting out what we do or do not like about other people.  We only tell them the good things.

If a dog runs up to another dog and sniffs and doesn't like what they see, they don't play nice-nice until they walk away - they bare their teeth, growl, bark and snarl and sometimes attack the animal they do not like.  If we act like dogs we are called (and I refer to women) bitches, snarky, catty, opinionated, judgemental, grating, confrontational and all sorts of other not so nice words that are not very complimentary of women.

I have found that when I was in my 20's I could be a real bitch.  When I was in my 30's I could be a real bitch too.  But having children has mellowed me some.  Partly due to not wanting to invest a lot of energy in stuff that I think is stupid and not wanting to get sucked into dysfunctional family stuff and staying out of it.  But when that dysfunction lands in my living room and stays here for a pretty lengthy period of time it is really hard to ignore it. (have I mentioned that I do enjoy complaining at length instead of being a bitch?)

I will say this:  the dysfunction isn't welcome back.  Somehow and sometime soon I will have to address that but it isn't welcome back and it isn't something I want anything to do with.  I've been in therapy for years to work at identifying my problems and fix them and so should you.  If you are not willing to do so - I'm not willing to be around you. 

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Love

I was watching a movie with someone I love very much.  During a particularly moving part of the movie two men who were very much in love kissed on the lips.  The person I love made a disgusted sound of distaste and it shocked me and upset me. And for a minute I got really angry.  And then I got really sad thinking that someone I love so much could be so bigoted and closed minded.  And it made me not want to finish the movie.  But then I realized that we can love people a whole lot but not love the way they are or the way they think.  And I was able to finish the movie and still love the person I was watching the movie with. 

I guess that makes me a grown up.

Monday, June 16, 2014

Diving

Today I got to watch my youngest child dive into the swimming pool over and over over.  She was so careful about the placement of her feet, the way her hands were held, one on top of the other, the way the other foot was out to the side to steady her and how close her feet were to the edge of the pool.  It was amazing to watch.  Both of my children swim really well and enjoy the water as much as they can.  I usually have to force them to leave the pool even if their eyes are bloodshot and their feet and fingers are raw from the bottom of the pool.

It took me a really long time to learn how to swim.  Of course my siblings learned really quickly so it seemed even longer.  I'm not sure if the reason it took me so long was the trauma of my father drowning or the even bigger trauma of being thrown in the deep end of by family members who would say that they were sure I would learn how to swim once I could no longer touch the bottom.  Regardless as to the reasons why I was slow to learn to swim, my kids were fast to learn as they were not hampered by any pool or water related trauma as children.

And I am a strong swimmer now even if I prefer to sit by the side of the pool with my floppy hat, stylish coverup and sipping my drink while I chat it up with my new N. Carolina pool friends.  Hey ya'll!